Hey friends, Dave Burkus here. Welcome back to the Daily Burk and today we are talking
about how to manage your energy at a networking event. Now this is a question I get a lot, obviously because of writing
“Friend of a Friend”, and the central thesis of
“Friend of a Friend” mind you is that a lot of these
networking events, these mixers, these open-ended cocktail
parties at conferences et cetera, a lot of them are not actually
the most effective way to improve your network or to create value for the
network around you, right? Staying with people you already know, checking back with weak ties and then using the friend of a friend, the one degree of separation out, to expand your sphere of influence. These are far better
methods, but there are times when you have to go to that event. And depending on how introverted
or extroverted you are, that affects how much energy
is either created at the event or drained at the event. But what’s interesting
is we tend to assume that introverts, it means that you don’t want to have
conversations with people. Extroverts it means you want to talk to everybody all the time. And it’s quite simply not true, right? Introverts don’t hate people. It has to do with the level
of stimulation in the room, the number of people who are in the room and whether or not that
level of stimulation creates or drains energy for you. So wherever you are, remember that introversion
and extroversion is a sliding scale. There aren’t just category introverts, category extroverts. Wherever you are on that, you will have to do some
trial and error around this, that effects the size
of the types of events you should go for, all right? If you are that extrovert
who gets energized by being in a room of 100 people then that’s the type of
event you should go for. If you are an introvert then the way that you
better manage your energy is you should be looking
for smaller things, maybe networking dinners where there’s only 10 people
or eight people, right? Most of these networking
dinners have to cap at about 12 because of private room
dynamics or home dynamics. So these are automatically
going to be smaller places. And then you also have to pay attention to how many conversations you can have before you’re drained. This is again a little
bit of trial and error. But we get in this weird feeling with these networking events where we feel we have to run up the score and it’s quite simply not true. You don’t have to talk
to everyone at the event. Three quality conversations
with new people, three quality conversations with people who may be someone introduces you to, to break the ice faster or maybe you summoned up
the courage to talk to them, but two or three quality conversations will always win over 20
surface-level conversations where you just collected
business cards after 30 seconds. Whether you’re an
introvert or an extrovert, you don’t need to be wasting
your time running up the score. But when it comes to managing your energy, the size of the room and
the number of conversations are what you have to feel out for. Give yourself permission
to not try and do it all. Do it all that you can within
the energy that you have that’s either created or drained based on your own personality. Thanks so much for watching
this episode of the Daily Burk. Leave a couple of introvert, extrovert, what’s the like optimal
size group for you to be in? I think it would help a lot of people to see other people’s optimal based on how introverted or
extroverted they would be. So leave that comment and while
you’re making that comment make sure you follow or
subscribe to the show because we post new episodes
every single weekday, designed to help you
do your best work ever and I wanna make sure you
don’t miss a single one. Thanks again so much for
watching the Daily Burk


  1. Awesome topic!

    I get a lot of energy from 'being the bowling ball not the pin'. I love opening conversations. However my voice gets tired in overly noisy environments. So my optimal condition is a large gathering, but spread out 🙂

    Looking forward to further working on those quality conversations!

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